Why is it that people are so willing to help F
and in says i hate them for it....well not hate but...
Some guy who is in NA apparently bought him a pre-paid phone today
and this same guy also has $200.00 for F to help him get into an oxford house.
Like whats the deal..it fucking annoys me for me some reason
Shouldn't i be happy he has people to help him
and also happy for the fact that its not me..
well for some reason it makes me..kinda mad..
Maybe its almost jealousy... im not sure
He fucks up..goes away for a lil while
Comes back and theres someone giving him things already
It's like geeez if i start doing drugs and going to jail are people gunna be buying me cells phones and diner and shit..
and in says i hate them for it....well not hate but...
Some guy who is in NA apparently bought him a pre-paid phone today
and this same guy also has $200.00 for F to help him get into an oxford house.
Like whats the deal..it fucking annoys me for me some reason
Shouldn't i be happy he has people to help him
and also happy for the fact that its not me..
well for some reason it makes me..kinda mad..
Maybe its almost jealousy... im not sure
He fucks up..goes away for a lil while
Comes back and theres someone giving him things already
It's like geeez if i start doing drugs and going to jail are people gunna be buying me cells phones and diner and shit..
I know thats a totally stupid thing to say
and i don't really feel that way
idk it's just weird..
i wish people would give him chance to get these things on his house instead of handing it to him
Might as well throw money at him
Like when we were engaged my dad gave him (us) like $900.00 for a truck for F
I was PISSED
I wish my dad had talked to me about if before offering that kinda money up
I was mad b/c i guess i knew he was using on and off
and i didnt want my dad to make that mistake
but he did anyway
and the truck is gone and yada yada yada
I just believe that giving him everything is not showing him anything except
"Hey i can just keep getting into trouble b/c i know there will be someone to give me shit when im out of jail"
He needs to live without those things until he can earn them on his own.
idk i just had to vent a little but im done
for now
Like when we were engaged my dad gave him (us) like $900.00 for a truck for F
I was PISSED
I wish my dad had talked to me about if before offering that kinda money up
I was mad b/c i guess i knew he was using on and off
and i didnt want my dad to make that mistake
but he did anyway
and the truck is gone and yada yada yada
I just believe that giving him everything is not showing him anything except
"Hey i can just keep getting into trouble b/c i know there will be someone to give me shit when im out of jail"
He needs to live without those things until he can earn them on his own.
idk i just had to vent a little but im done
for now
4 comments:
What a journey you continue to travel. I believe it is a great thing to help another person. However, there is also that thing called personal responsibility. I wonder how much of that he has? Focus on yourself. Focus on what you need. Focus on what makes you happy. Take the focus off him. You need to try and do that for yourself.
ohh hon, feel how you feel. you have earned that much. i can understand it totally.
i hope things go smoothly for you, and get easier on you. i am sure you feel the weight of the world now. hang in there.
yeah, it furstrating when they seem to get all this help that, frankly, we could all really use.
'whattya do' though. Just foucus on your side of the street. Looks like your doing just fine
Keep working on you. And let him work on him.
People in early recovery do sometimes needs some help. What he does with it now is up to him.
Peace,
Scout
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